By: Paul Mangay
Safe sex doesn’t have to be boring, just because you use condoms. Here’s your guide to picking the right one to spice up your bedroom escapades!
Condoms are one of the important commodities a dating man must have in addition to breath-freshening gum and a sense of humor. It’ll never hurt to have one or two in your man pouch for those unexpected sexual encounters. Plus, you never know if your lady prospect is a “no glove, no love” type.
Aside from providing protection from sexually transmitted diseases and as a means of contraception, these fun balloons can also serve you by increasing your and your partner’s chance to have steamy, hot sex.
A condom or “rubber” is a type of a barrier device that is put on an erect penis prior to sexual intercourse. It was used as a form of birth control, and later as a deterrent from acquiring sexually transmitted diseases such as syphilis, HIV, etc.
Early condoms were made from various materials such as leather, animal intestines, and chemically-treated linen. These types were usually flimsy and were not as effective compared to modern condoms and were only available to the upper classes because of its high cost. One early patron was 18th century Venetian adventurer, spy, and womanizer Giacomo Casanova. He even tested his “anti-birth caps” by blowing in them to make balloons to check for holes.
As technology and the industry progressed, rubber-based condoms, and later polyurethane, would become the standard material for manufacturing your trusty “fiveskin.” In addition, STD awareness provided an avenue for increased public demand for condoms to facilitate safe sex.
Know your sheath
For a condom to properly serve its purpose, one must choose the right type that would fit *pun not intended* into your sexual lifestyle. Don’t just pick a random box in the mini mart, just because you like the packaging. Read the label and know what it does. If you’re too shy to spend a minute to read in the aisle because of awkward stares from fellow shoppers, do your online research beforehand.
Here are some of the things you should consider before purchasing your love glove:
#1 Size. Most manufacturers offer standard size condoms that would fit most men, but it is very important for each user to know the exact condom fit for themselves. Condoms should fit around the penis snugly without slipping during action, and should not be too tight to strangle your dong into a gangrenous lump.
For those guys in the far ends of the curve, you don’t need to worry, small and XL sizes are also available. A gentle reminder: an ill-fitting condom can ruin good sex by slipping off if it’s too loose, and ruining your future by tearing, if it’s too small.
#2 Thickness. Standard condoms are usually 0.04 – 0.07mm thick and are designed to withstand average coital friction without tearing. For heavy duty action, thick condoms above 0.09mm are available for guys into rough action, such as anal sex, as these activities produce more friction that would wear down standard condoms. For couples who would rather opt for slow, tai-chi methodical sex, you may choose thin or super thin condoms that would sacrifice durability for extra pleasure.
#3 Material. As discussed, modern condoms are made of rubber latex derivatives. Latex is predominant as it is cheap and durable compared to other materials. For those people who are allergic to latex, you may choose to use polyurethane or polyisoprene-based condoms. Other manufacturers even regress to making lamb skin condoms for people who aren’t squeamish about wrapping their junk in animal parts.
#4 Male/female condoms. Condoms are also available for women, which appears larger and more firm than its male counterpart. The downside for this type is that it is more expensive and much harder to obtain than male condoms. Female condoms are for those couples who would like to skip the interlude of having to put the condom and ruin the foreplay momentum.
Yearly, the sex industry is making lots of interesting stuff to help couples enjoy their sex life, condoms included. Once you’ve learned the basics of choosing and using condoms, try to spice things up by introducing these kinky, novelty condoms to surprise your partner. You can choose one that would best fit the mood, or if you’re both curious and open-minded, try to deviate from the normal categories and try these:
#1 Textured condoms. These babies are designed to stimulate the fun parts that would otherwise be ignored during the usual humping. Textures would include ribs, studs, dots, and protruding edges that would rub against the female G-spot or the male glans during intercourse. Some would incorporate a complicated swirly ribbing that would make your wang look like a drill for the drilling that you’ll be doing.
#2 Special lubricated condoms. Condoms are prelubricated with the usual water-based slick but some are incorporated with special lubricants such as spermicidal, antibacterial, anesthetic, and cooling/warming gels.
– Spermicidal. For those couples who really want to be safe, spermicidal condoms are equipped with a gel that kills sperm cells after ejaculation. This is a good precaution in case your condom breaks, or if you’re doing it during her fertile period.
– Anesthetic. These types include a mild topical anesthetic that is absorbed in the penis’ skin upon wearing it. It makes the guy numb for a period of time, allowing him to give her that porn-grade humping duration. The anesthetic wears off after quite some time, giving you permission to come after you’ve pumped her into a good orgasm.
– Cooling or warming gels: Your choice, if you want to feel like you’re having sex with a Jalapeno or if you have cold undead body sex fetishes. These condoms come in single layer, where the wearer or the partner feels the effect, or dual layer where both parties enjoy the sensation.
#3 Ultrathin condoms. As the name implies, the condom is so thin that it feels like you’re doing it bare. This type is for couples who aren’t really into condoms, but can’t go without being safe anyways. The downside is that ultrathin condoms sacrifice protection for that skin-like pleasure. Many condom manufacturers have dabbled into producing the perfect ultra-thin condom that balances protection and pleasure.
#4 Flavored condoms. For those who use condoms in oral sex, you have the classic flavors like chocolate, mint, vanilla, bubblegum, and lots of different fruit flavors. Nowadays, the condoms industry has innovative flavors, as well as borderline weird ones. Ever heard of cocktail-flavored condoms? Yeah, you name it: pinacolada, bloody mary, long island, martini, etc. There are also the downright strange ones like licorice and bacon. Yes. Bacon.
#5 Glow in the dark condoms. With this condom, you can turn your penis into a personal glow stick! This is appropriate if you’re planning to give your partner rave party-themed sex. Turn off the lights, wear some glow sticks, and hump her with your luminescent baton to the beats of Daft Punk.
#6 Printed and Tantric condoms. These condoms don’t do anything much but to increase your penis’ visual appeal. Tantric condoms incorporate a tattoo-like design, and sometimes textures, to make your foreplay more sensual before you try all the positions in the Kama Sutra. Some are herb- or incense-scented to increase the fantasy that you’re performing an ancient love ritual.
Mix and match
Now that you know the different condom types, you can now go ahead and pick what’s best for you and your partner. The trick is to try new ones, and find which types make you and your partner comfortable. You can buy sets and arrange them in order according to your planned activity for the night.
#1 Long foreplay. Start the act with printed or flavored condoms for a visual tease and oral sex. Warm her up visually and make her greedy for your member. After your first load, get to serious business with thick condoms to give her that high endurance action for the next 30 minutes.
#2 If you’re the type that gets off quickly during the first round. Try using thick latex ones to catch the big fish. After you’ve set your pace and recovered, take her to the scenic route and give long, slow thrusts wearing a textured or cooling gel condom to work your way to a happy ending.
#3 If you’re straightforward and pay little heed to bedroom theatrics. Wear an anesthetic condom and do her while looking at her straight in the eye. After coming the first time, your penis will feel a little numb and raw. This time, use ultra-thin ones for both your pleasures, and jump back in the foray and finish her.
Condoms have transcended their primary contraceptive use and have the remarkable ability to give you and your partner the best sexual experience ever. It is up to your bedroom creativity and preferences to determine which suits you best. Just remember that carrying condoms is a shared responsibility and should provide equal pleasure to you and your partner.